


Now Accepting Your Calls

by pinkevilbob



Series: Pinkevilbob's Widojest Week [10]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Widojest Week, are you secretly in love with me?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-14
Updated: 2019-07-14
Packaged: 2020-06-28 00:42:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 998
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19801156
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pinkevilbob/pseuds/pinkevilbob
Summary: Caleb's up in the middle of the night with questions and no answers. So why not call the premier advice hotline of Wildemount?





	Now Accepting Your Calls

**Author's Note:**

> AHHHH! The final day of Widojest Week baby! It was a fun ride and thanks for reading! This uses both 'Are you secretly in love with me?' and technically Zone of Truth.
> 
> I picture this being in the 90s, but I figure that still counts as a modern AU.

4:23 AM was a forsaken time of night. Or perhaps morning. Caleb wasn't sure which it counted as. Reruns of the Dick Van Dyke show played on the tv and Caleb was watching it in an attempt to drown out his racing mind, but it was no use. What Nott told him kept bothering him.

"You should ask Jester out," she said. It was a terrible suggestion, but something he needed to hear. Caleb had no clue that his crush was so obvious. And that's all it was; a crush. Nothing more serious than that. All he had to do was stamp it out. If it were only that simple.

A commercial started to play. "Have questions about life? Work? School? Love?" Caleb's ears perked at that. "Then call the Zone of Truth hotline. We have all the advice and answers you need." A beautiful red tiefling woman appeared on the screen and below her the phone number.

It was just one of those dumb advice hotlines, but Caleb found himself dialing the number anyways. He needed to convince someone that asking out Jester was a terrible idea, and honestly an advice hotline person seemed more reasonable than his friends at the moment.

Caleb counted the rings waiting for the hotline operator to answer it. It was a terrible idea, but he didn't hang up. Part of him was curious to see what this hotline was all about. "Hello, this is the Zone of Truth. Here to lead you to the truth. My name’s the Little Sapphire.” It was a chipper voice on the other end of the phone and she almost sounded familiar.

“Uh, ja halo,” Caleb said so nervous he nearly dropped his phone. “I need some advice.”

“That’s what the Zone of Truth is for,” the Little Sapphire said. “So, tell me what kind of advice are you looking for? Job, dating, school, perhaps a big decision on your horizon?”

Caleb blushed with embarrassment. It felt so silly having to say it out loud. "It's romantic in nature. I have this friend and she's perfect. She's adorable and lights up every room she's in and it's impossible to not fall in love with her."

"So you want to know how to ask her out?" the Little Sapphire asked.

"Nein. I can't do that!" Caleb blurted out.

"So you're afraid of upsetting your friendship. There's ways of checking to see if she feels the same way you do."

Caleb sighed. "It's not like that. I don't deserve her. We'd be a terrible fit."

"Isn't that up for her to decide?" the Little Sapphire asked. "Sometimes you have to let people make decisions for themselves."

He shook his head. "Nein. She's mischief and laughter and so kind at the same time. I'm sad and books and mistakes."

"Opposites do attract sometimes. Your friend might say yes if you ask her out," she said. "You sound a lot like a friend of mine. He's sweet, but you have to be real patient to catch him smiling and it's real lucky when he laughs."

"I'm lucky to be friends with her, I keep worrying that she'll wisen up and realize just how terrible I am," Caleb said.

"Well, she must not think that you're terrible then."

Caleb rubbed his forehead. "That's because I hide it. I've done terrible things in the past. Things that I can never let Jester know."

"Jester?" The Little Sapphire sounded surprised.

"Ja. It's not a common name, but it's hers." And it was perfect for Jester.

"And this Jester of yours, is she a tiefling? A blue one?" Her voice was nervous and hesitant.

Caleb taken aback. "How did you know?" Was this a psychic hotline?

"Caleb?" the Little Sapphire asked. Caleb nearly dropped the phone. He never gave her his name. "Are you secretly in love with me?"

All at once he realized why the voice sounded so familiar. It was Jester. "It's not a secret anymore, is it? But why are you here, Jester?"

"This is my night job. My mom owns the hotline and is the main one behind it, but she's letting me work here. I like giving people advice."

"Well, you do a very good job at it," Caleb said.

He didn't have to see Jester to know that she was beaming. "Really?! So are you going to follow my advice?"

"What?"

"Are you going to ask me out?!" In his mind's eye, Caleb could see Jester perched at her work station leaning forward with a mischievous smile on her face.

Caleb turned red. "I can't do that. That would be putting you on the spot at work. You don't have to be nice to me just because I was vulnerable at your work place. I shouldn't have called. I'm sorry." He started to put the phone down.

"No, wait! Caleb! I'm not just being nice because I'm at work. You’re my friend and I honestly like you. There's something I need to ask you before you hang up," Jester said.

"What is it?"

"Will you go to the movies with me on Saturday? There's supposed to be some good ones. And maybe get a bite to eat afterwards?" Jester sounded so shy he barely recognized her voice, but he could tell that she wasn't joking.

Caleb stood up. "Ja! I mean yes. That sounds good to me."

Jester giggled. "That's great! I'll see you at three?"

Caleb nodded dumbly before remembering that she couldn't see him."Ja. See you at three on Saturday."

"Great! I should probably let you go. These calls aren't cheap."

Caleb swore remembering just how expensive this call was going to be. "Goodbye Jester."

"Bye!" She hung up and Caleb stayed on the line until the dial tone started playing.

A numbness took over Caleb as he stared at the phone. He had a date. Jester asked him out on a date. Maybe calling this hotline wasn't such a bad idea after all.


End file.
